My Colonoscopy Adventure

I was a colonoscopy virgin and I was way overdue to get that status changed.  My nephew, James, who will soon be a graduate of Temple University School of Medicine in the spring, was totally on my case about this and I am very grateful.  He claims that no one needs to die of colon cancer.  So, as per his suggestion, I am writing about my adventure in order to inspire others to do the same.

I had always heard that the preparation was worse than the actual procedure.  I had a choice of a few Doctors that were referred by friends and I made my appointment for October.  Unfortunately, superstorm Sandy arrived and that delayed my colonoscopy (much to my delight!).  I still had my MoviPrep box (a.k.a. colonoscopy cocktail) sitting in my closet waiting for me as a nagging reminder.  So I rescheduled it for December. 

The day before my procedure I decided to fill up my day with fun things to do (since I would not be eating) so I went to Restorative Yoga (my stomach was growling through child’s pose) and then the hair salon after that.  By 6 p.m. it was time to prepare my “cocktail”.  You mix two packets of powder together in a one-liter plastic jug filled with lukewarm water.  Then you drink the whole jug in four doses within an hour.  I first thought, “wow – this isn’t really so bad”.  My impression changed by the time I was ready for my 4^th dose!  For me, nothing happened for a least 4 hours and, even at that time, it wasn’t anything impressive.  I went to bed and slept straight through until 4 a.m.  I was awakened by my stomach gurgling – my cleansing process was beginning. But I had to start drinking another dose of the MoviPrep and, at that time of the morning, the thought was not very appealing.  So now the funny part starts because as I am drinking I am running to the toilet bowl.  Now that I am looking back, I can laugh – this went on for about 2 hours and, by then, I had nothing left in my colon. 

When I arrived at the Doctor’s office, I was taken into the procedure room given that cute white gown to put on and greeted by the anesthesiologist.  I immediately cautioned him that I had low blood pressure, a low heart rate and rolling veins.  He said, “I don’t scare easily”.  I am thinking “Okay, Dude – we’ll soon see about that”.  He hooked up the IV in my left hand and pretty soon I was in sleepy land.  The next thing I remember is that I felt the tube coming OUT of my backside and I heard, “all done”.  I was able to hop off the table and proceed to get dressed.  The anesthesia that they administer is usually Propofol or something similar (the Michael Jackson cocktail) so there are virtually no side effects and the recovery is quick.  I got a clean bill of health and was told that I should have another in 5 – 8 years.  Yipee – can’t wait to repeat this! I have to confirm that the procedure is nothing compared to the prep.  So, if you are over 50 and have not had yours, perhaps you should be thinking about it.  Of course, if you have a family history, your Doctor might suggest that you have one done sooner.